Unleashing Potential - Personal development through online coaching and training courses
“Everyone believes the world’s greatest lie…” says the mysterious old man.
“What is the world’s greatest lie?” the little boy asks.
The old man replies, “It’s this: that at a certain point in our lives, we lose control of what’s happening to us, and our lives become controlled by fate. That’s the world’s greatest lie.”
(An excerpt from The Alchemist by Paulo Coelho. A fable about following your dreams.) [Read more...]
All too often, we distort what we see in front of us to fit in with our beliefs – it is difficult to be objective in the way we observe things. [Read more...]
A while back I wrote a post called 10 Things I Wish I Had Known And Stuck To From Early On. Here’s another ten things I’ve learned, occasionally quickly, more often only after repeatedly banging my head against a brick wall! [Read more...]
On a scale of 1 – 10 where 1 represents not intelligent and 10 is very intelligent, how do you rate your intelligence? Don’t scroll down the page until you’ve evaluated yourself, or you will spoil the fun.
In rating yourself, how did you define intelligence? Traditionally, educators have followed the example of the IQ or similar test and focused on attainment in maths and your mother tongue. Yet, this is a very narrow definition of intelligence.
How come when children enter school at age 5 they are pretty much all of them creative. yet when they go to senior school at 11 or 13, very few of them are creative? What’s happened? Why do we not include creativity in our definition of intelligence?
Look at someone like Gillian Lynne – teachers thought she was failing at school because she never appeared to be paying attention and was always fidgeting. The world was indeed fortunate that she was sent to a psychologist who recognised the signs and saw that she interpreted the world through physical motion. He suggested she be sent to stage school. These days, most psychologists would have diagnosed ADD/ADHD and put her on Ritalin! Why do we not include physical expression as a form of intelligence?
The huge irony in this is that IQ tests were never intended to test how intelligent we are in terms of degrees of intelligence. Alfred Binet, one of the co-developers of IQ tests, was commissioned by the French government to develop a test that would identify children whose intelligence was blow a minimum threshold so that they could receive remedial schooling. He rejected the idea of using his test to compare intelligence or to select individuals on the basis of their scoring well.
Lewis Terman, who revised Binet’s test and developed what is known as the “Stanford-Binet” test, had a completely different agenda. He was a major player in the eugenics movement and all that that implied!
There is an increase in interest in areas like Emotional and Spiritual Intelligence, particularly in the workplace. I suggest that we need to rethink what we mean by intelligence in school too.
But I am interested, how did you define intelligence when you were rating yourself?
We have are many fears that may limit our success; in this two-part article, I will be examining 10 of those that jeopardise way of our health, wealth and happiness..
1. Fear of Failure
Do you hold yourself back from doing what you really want to do because you’re afraid of failing? If so, ask yourself a simple question – how do you know you will fail? If you really feel a calling to do it, whatever ‘it’ might be, then know that you are supported in your efforts, you are not alone.
And anyway, in the unlikely event that things didn’t turn out as you had hoped, what would be the cost of failing? Often it’s just time and perhaps a loss of face – another tip for you:
Reframe ‘Failure’ as feedback and look for the positive
As many people know, Eddison took over 10,000 attempts before successfully inventing the light bulb and saw each ‘failed’ attempt as having discovered one more way that didn’t work. Anthony Robbins went bankrupt before reinventing himself and becoming possibly the most successful inspirational speaker on the planet. Study the biographies of people like Joe Vitale, Richard Branson, Amitabh Bachchan, Pat O’Bryan, Oprah Winfrey and many others; you’ll find that in most cases, they suffered setbacks on the way.
All too often, we fear a loss of control or believe that we have no choices. That’s partly because we see things in a single frame of reference, but by reframing, we re-affirm to ourselves that we have options and choices, that we have some control over our lives.
One of the big differences between successful and unsuccessful people is the ability of the successful to reframe negative situations. While the ‘average’ person looks at the undesirable result as failure, the successful person looks at it simply as an outcome, then tries something else and ultimately produces their desired result.
2. Fear of Success/It takes so much energy to succeed.
Whilst some people are afraid of failure, others are afraid of the success, or of their perception of the price that they will have to pay for their success.
Or they would rather find a short cut that makes it effortless? Either way, they are not prepared to put in the effort required to ensure success. Some are lazy; others have been seduced by the books that suggest that if they utter a few affirmations and believe in the ‘Law of Attraction’, health, wealth and happiness will fall into their laps. There is nothing wrong with the Law of Attraction but somewhere along the way it became over-simplified. You still have to take direct action!
3. Poverty or Scarcity Consciousness
Most of us were told when we were growing up that we should not be greedy or selfish. We may also have been brought up to believe that the world has only a limited amount of resources, that there’s not enough to go round so we’re being selfish if we succeed.
John Kehoe (1992) summed it up when writing:
“Imprint these 4 prosperity beliefs into your unconscious mind:
There is nothing greedy or unspiritual about having money; it’s what you do with it that matters. The negative aspect is greed, keeping it all for yourself, wanting money for money’s sake. The positive is all the good you can do with the money you earn – it’s difficult to make a difference in the world without earning the money first.
4. Life is hard with little reward
You are wealthy right now! We all have riches, whether family, friends, place of worship, financial wealth, work, organisations we belong to etc. The thing is, only financial wealth pays the bills. You can choose to build your riches, including your financial wealth, or you can undermine yourself with poverty consciousness and believing you are unworthy to have money. It’s up to you! Yes you have to put the effort in, and the reward is commensurate with the effectiveness of the effort you put in.
Note the subtle difference – I didn’t write that the ‘reward is commensurate with the effort you put in’, but with the ‘effectiveness of the effort.’ There’s a huge difference!
The distinction is simple – effectiveness means doing the right things (as opposed to efficiency which means doing things in the best way), so are you being effective? In other words, is everything you do aimed at living your dream? If the answer is ‘no!’, then yes, life can appear to be hard with little reward.
True success never diminishes someone else, is never selfish. Make sure that you never allow yourself to be jealous of someone else’s success. Instead, see it as proof that if they can succeed, so can you! As well as the direct benefits your service provides, there are also the indirect benefits; you spend the fruits of your success, creating profit for others, contributing to the economy as those people in turn spend their greater profits and so on.
5. Having a closed mind
This is typified by phrases such as ‘There are already so many books out there’, ‘That won’t work for me because…’, ‘It won’t work in the current economic climate’, ‘That might work for most people, but I’m different/my situation is different’, and so on. A closed mind is another way of saying that ‘My perception of the world is right and is the only valid one.’ It actually becomes a self-reinforcing, vicious circle; your perception is your reality, as we will see later. If you continue to believe that it’s ‘Your way or the highway’, then you are right, it won’t work for you; A closed mind closes down its options.
Find out your life's purpose;
Establish your definition of success;
Set goals and timescales for all areas of your life;
Balance the physical, emotional, mental and spiritual dimensions of your life;
Create financial security;
Develop plans to help you to achieve those goals;
Help you to manage stress effectively;
Learn to communicate effectively and to influence and persuade others;
Build and maintain great relationships;
Maximise your health and energy levels;
Enjoy life and have fun!
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